


why me?

by history_maker05



Series: Little! BTS [4]
Category: EXO (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Age Play Little Jeon Jungkook, Age Play Little Min Yoongi | Suga, Fluff and Angst, I'm Bad At Tagging, Non-Sexual Age Play, Open Ending, mostly angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 21:36:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 7,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17271563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/history_maker05/pseuds/history_maker05
Summary: Being a little isn't always fun. Jungkook sure knew that. He hates it, he hates it so much. He hates having to watch Yoongi getting all the attention, while no one even notices him. He hates getting ignored all the time, and it's time to change something about it.He didn't meant it to happen like this, he really didn't. It was an accident.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SmollEmoBean](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmollEmoBean/gifts).



> this is shitty, and i'm sorry. I'm tired of myself at the moment. This one was requested by @smollemobean and i apologise for not writing something better

It was a calm and lazy sunday in BTS' dorm. It was quiet, everyone doing their own stuff. It was nice, Jungkook thought.

Until a scream pierced through the peaceful silence. All the members, except Jungkook, rushed to the source of the scream. Min Yoongi. 

The rapper was squirming around on his bed, tears streaming down his face as he cried out. The mother of the group, Jin, rushed towards the smaller boy, sitting down on his bed and lifting him in his lap.

''Hey, hey baby what's wrong?'', Jin said softly as he held Yoongi close. The younger hid his face, sniffling sadly. His sobs had died down to sniffles the moment Jin lifted him up. Namjoon sat down beside Jin, and Hoseok started rubbing the little's back. Taehyung and Jimin were both looking scared, pressed against the wall.

Yoongi looked up with a sad pout. ''H-Had nightmawe...'', he lisped, the pout intensifying. Jin and Namjoon both cooed at Yoongi's cuteness. ''Let's dress this little baby in a warm onesie and eat breakfast okay?'', Jin said as Namjoon got up. "I'm gonna make breakfast", he said, wanting to help.

''Eh, no. Sorry Joonie baby, but i won't let you inside my kitchen'', Jin said while the others burst into laughter. Namjoon pouted and huffed, Grabbing Yoongi's onesie. Taehyung and Jimin went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast, completely missing Jungkooks attempts to talk to them. 

''T-Taetae hyungie? K-Kookie wan c-cuddwes...", Jungkook tried to say as Jimin and Taehyung approached him. They didn't even look at him as they walked past him, ignoring the little's existence. Jungkook pouted and crawled to his small room, sniffling softly as he grabbed his only friend. ''Bunbun, hyungies h-hate K-Kookie!'', he mumbled as he hid his face in the belly of the bunny, sobbing quietly. 

Being a little isn't always fun. Jungkook sure knew that. He hates it, he hates it so much. He hates having to watch Yoongi getting all the attention, while no one even notices him. It reminds him of his mother, his father, the two people who ignored him all day, too busy with work. His brother, who was oh so popular, had such good grades, who was 'perfect'. It reminds him of all the times he tried to be better, all the times he was just searching for love, though he knew he wouldn't get it. 

He hates getting ignored all the time, and it's time to change something about it.

while everyone was busy with making breakfast, Jungkook quietly crawled towards Yoongi, Bunbun close to him. 

Yoongi looked up. He'd always liked Jungkook as a friend, he never hated him. But his hyungs were always so busy with playing with him, or feeding him, or watching cartoons with him, that the little never had time to play with Jungkook. He didn't know his hyungs ignored Jungkook, it wasn't his fault. 

Jungkook never thought it was Yoongi's fault.

The two little's were playing nicely together, Yoongi sharing his toys and Jungkook thanking him like a good boy. Well, that was before Hoseok walked in.

Jungkook was trying to reach Yoongi's favorite toy, but it was on the top shelf. When Yoongi started pointing and a=staring at the stuffed animal, Jungkook got up and tried to reach it for the smaller boy. 

He almost had it, almost. But Jungkook lost his balance, falling on top of Yoongi. 

The small boy started crying loudly, and a few moments later Namjoon and Hoseok rushed in. ''Jungkook! Bad boy!'', Namjoon yelled while Hoseok pushed Jungkook away, lifting the crying Yoongi up to calm him down. 

Jung kook's bottom lip trembled as he looked up at Namjoon in fear, tears pooling in his eyes.

''You have three seconds to explain yourself'', Namjoon said harshly, pulling Jeongguk up by his wrist. Jungkook's mind was blank with fear, and he couldn't find any words to explain himself. Namjoon huffed. "i am very disappointed in you.'', Namjoon said before pulling Jungkook to the bed. ''25 hits, and 30 minutes corner time", he said as he laid Jungkook across his lap, pulling his pants down before hitting Jungkooks tushy. 

Jungkook bit his lip to keep quiet, tears streaming down his face as he mumbled apologies. Namjoon continued, not holding back as he hit Jungkook 25 times. Jungkook felt sore, and it was stinging and he just wanted to cuddle. But he still had his corner time. 

Namjoon dropped Jungkook onto the floor near the corner, not even being careful for his now bruised and sore body. Jungkook sobbed as he waited and waited and waited, staying in the cold and lonely corner for the rest of the day as everyone once again ignored him. 

Jung kook gave up on trying to be good, he gave up on trying to stay healthy. He didn't leave his room unless necessary, staring out of the window most of the time, daydreaming about a loving family, friends, people who would notice him and accept him the way he was. 

A week passed, and nobody noticed Jungkook packing his stuff, no one noticed how he sneaked out of the dorm at night, and nobody heard the soft 'goodbye' before the sound of the front door closing softly disturbed the heavy silence. 

Jung kook ran. He ran as fast as he could until his legs couldn't carry him anymore. He collapsed onto a chair at a bus station, grabbing his phone as he called the only person he thought he could trust. 

''Kookie, why're you calling so late? Is everything alright?'', a familiar voice answered the phone. Jungkook let out a sob and replied with a shaking voice. 

''Please come get me, I need a place to stay over for a while"

Jungkook sniffled as he didn't got an answer, the only sound that was heard was the beeping of the phone, telling him that the other had hung up the phone.

Minutes passed as Jungkook shivered, the cold rain that had started a while ago soaking his clothes. Suddenly, Jungkook was blinded by something that seemed to be a very bright lamp. Jung kook covered his eyes, not noticing the person that got out of the thing in front of him.

''Oh Jungkook...'', the same voice as on the phone said. Jungkook opened his eyes and threw himself against the person.

''I'm here, let's get you warmed up'', Baekhyun said softly, lifting Jungkook up and carrying him to his car. Jungkook stayed silent the whole way to EXO's dorm, sniffling every now and then. 

''You don't have to tell me what's wrong right now, but i wanna know it later okay?'', Baekhyun said as everyone gathered in the living room, Jungkook in the middle of of a pile made of blankets and pillows to warm him up.

''Kookie jus' wan be happy...'', Jung kook mumbled, and Xiumin cooed, hugging the little. ''It'll be okay, I promise''

Everyone else in the room nodded, and looked at Suho as he spoke. "You can stay here for a while Jungkook, you're safe here. Where do you wanna sleep?'', the leader said. 

''With me!'', Xiumin and Kai said at the same time.

”no with me!”, Baekhyun said, a bright smile on his face. That was the start of an argument between the members, all of them wanting to have a sleep over with the cute little.

Jungkook whimpered and hid himself underneath the blanket, not liking the loud voices. 

Suho saw this and smiled, lifting the small boy up. “Guys, stop okay? Kookie will be staying with Baekhyun.

”but-..”, Kai started.

”No buts except yours over my knees if you don’t stop whining right now.”

Kai pouted and huffed, mumbling something about ‘unfairness’.

”Did I hear something, Kai?”, Suho asking, raising his brows. Kai blushed and quickly shook his head.

Suho smiled and got up with Jungkook, who was looking at the person who was holding him.

”Don’t worry Jungkook, you’re safe with us” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook wakes up in an unfamiliar room. Panic follows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More shitty writing yay!

Light filled the room where Jungkook was sleeping, his eyes slowly opened as he whined. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, blinking as he looked around.

Where was he? This wasn't his room! Was he kidnapped?!

Jung kook's bottom lip started trembling as he teared up, and soon cries filled the room, piercing through the peaceful silence. 

Baekhyun rushed inside his room, hurrying towards the younger boy. ''Hey, Kookie you're safe, you're safe with us'', he whispered to the distraught boy.

Jungkook snuggled against the older boy, soft sniffles and hiccups still filling the silence. After a while, Jungkook looked up, eyes filled with fear and insecurity.

''K-Kookie s-sowwy...'', he softly mumbled, hiding his face.

Baekhyun softly chuckled. ''Baby, don't be sorry, I should've stayed here'', he softly scolded himself. Jungkook shook hid head with a pout, squishing Baekhyun's cheeks.

Baekhyun laughed and lifted the small boy up. "Let's eat breakfast hm?'', he said as he walked to the kitchen. 

Soon everyone was sitting at the table, happily talking with each other as they ate. Jungkook stared at rice and the chopsticks in front of him, pouting as he couldn't use chopsticks when he was little.

''Are you not hungry, Jungkook?''

Jungkook looked up at the sudden question from Kai, his cheeks red as he looked down in hame. 

''Kookie no eat wif chopstickies...'', he mumbled, and covered his ears as he was scared that the others would laugh at him. He didn't got any response for a few minutes, until he felt something pushing against his lips gently.

''Open up baby, I've got some delicious milk for you''

Jungkook hesitated before opening his mouth, sucking slightly and humming happily as he tasted milk.

Jungkook drank the bottle, cheeks still a light pink but his hands no longer covering his ears.

''What do you want to do today Kookie?'', someone asked him. Jungkook looked up in surprise. He wasn't used to people asking him what he wanted, he wasn't used to people wanting to know what he thought. 

He shrugged at first, not knowing what he wanted to do, but after a few minutes he spoke again. 

''Wan go to maww!'', he said, a bright smile in his face. 

2 hours later Jungkook found himself skipping around the mall with Baekhyun while Suho was trying to keep up with the overexcited boys. 

They went shopping, buying clothes and toys for Jungkook, the little squealing happily as he hugged a bunny stuffy.

They went to the arcade, Jungkook laughing at Baekhyun who screamed as he lost, while Xiumin was cheering. 

and they went out to get food, and Jungkook was truly amazed. He had never eaten food this delicious, as he never went out with his own hyungs.

His hyungs... The people who forgot about him, the people who didn't care about his feelings, the people who often didn't remember that their maknae was crying himself to sleep.

Jungkook pushed the mean thoughts away, enjoying the moment, not wanting to think about sad things.

At the end of the day, Jungkook was tired as he laid his head on D.O's shoulder as the older boy carried him back to their dorm. 

''Did you have a good time?'', the members asked the tired boy. Jungkook was too tired to answer, so he nodded slightly and smiled brightly before closing his eyes, dozing off.

Baekhyun took the tired boy to his room and changed him into his new bunny onesie, and laid him down in bed.

''Good night Jungkook, sleep well"

Those were the last words Jungkook heard before he fell asleep.

\-------

Meanwhile the members of BTS were getting yelled at.

''M-Mananger nim we-..''

''Shut up!!! Assholes, you can't do anything huh?!"

Yoongi's bottom lip trembled as he cried silently, his little age not understanding what was happening, but he did know that they did something wrong. He hid himself as he pressed his face against Taehyung's chest. Taehyung was crying too, he never liked loud people, especially not when they yelled at him.

Namjoon looked down in shame, blaming himself as he was the leader. Jin was rubbing Hoseoks back as their sunshine was staring at the wall, his face blank and eyes dull.

After their mananger was done with yelling at them, he left.

''We... We have to find him'', Namjoon said, breaking the tense and emotional atmosphere.

Taehyung got up and took the tired and sad Yoongi to his room, cuddling in bed with the crying little.

Jimin locked himself in his room, not talking to anyone. Hoseok slept with Jin that night, not wanting to sleep in his lonely room, on his own. Namjoon cuddled with his Ryan plushies, trying to forget the guilt that was clouding his mind.

To say it shortly, Bangtan was sorry. They just wanted their Kookie back.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit short, i know, I just had no inspiration.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yoongi's birthday turned out to be a little different than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back with shit writing

Bangtan had been searching everywhere for Jungkook, but they never found him. They searched all day and night, their bodies almost collapsing as they needed food and sleep.

Yoongi's birthday was approaching, and the members didn't want their little to have a sad birthday. The little didn't come out of his headspace, his headspace around 2 years old.

Yoongi happily clapped his hands as Jin was dressing him. They were going to the beach, as it was already nice and sunny outside. Yoongi loved the sea, he loved the sand and the sun and he loved to watch Namjoon trying to catch some crabs.

Yoongi hugged his cat stuffie, his birthday present, tight to his chest, mumbling softly to it.

Jin smiled and lifted the small boy up, holding him with one arm as he grabbed the last few things.  
''All ready to go?!'', he yelled upstairs, chuckling when he saw Jimin and Taehyung stumbling down the stairs, both stuck with their heads in their shirts.

''Eh, a little help would be appreciated!'', Taehyung's shirt said. Hoseok laughed as he pulled Taehyungs and Jimin's shirts down, poking their stomaches.

Namjoon smiled and kissed Yoongi's head. "All ready to go"  
———-  
Jungkook was sitting on Xiumin’s lap, happily finishing his bottle as the others were trying to put all their stuff into the car.

”Suho, this isn’t fair! We have to do this while Xiumin is cuddling with Kookie! Not fair!”, Baekhyun whined.  
Jungkook giggled and squished Xiumin’s cheeks, laughing softly. He kissed the older boy’s cheek with a loud ‘mwah!’. 

You see, Suho promised Jungkook that they could go to the beach, and it was sunny today, so Jungkook continued fussing and whining until they all gave in.

As soon as they were all sitting in the car Jungkook stared out of the window, and he gasped once he saw the first bit of the sea.

Jungkook and Baekhyun ran out of the car as soon as they stopped, both ignoring Suho’s attempts to get them back. 

They sat down on the sand, the sea wetting their feet. Jungkook enjoyed the sun shining down on them, the sound of waves crashing against the shore calming him.

He never thought that this perfect day could be ruined in one second.

————  
He had been playing with Jimin when he heard it. A familiar laugh. A laugh that he loved and missed.

Yoongi looked up and gasped when he saw Jungkook playing with Baekhyun and Kai, and he got up suddenly.

“Yoongi what’s wro-...”, Jimin tried to ask but Yoongi was already running away.

He started crying as he ran towards Jungkook, tackling the other in a hug. 

Jungkook was surprised, to say at least, when he suddenly found a crying Yoongi hugging him, sobbing harshly.

Jungkook wrapped his arms around the other little, rubbing his back.

“K-Kookie no w-weave! Y-Yoonyoon s-sowwy!”, Yoongi cried, desperate as he didn’t want Jungkook to leave again.

Jungkook sniffled, he didn’t want to leave Yoongi, but his hyungs hate him right?

Jungkook started crying too when he saw Namjoon and Taehyung running towards them, but instead of getting mad at him like usually, they hugged him.

They hugged him, and Jungkook was happy. They didn’t hate him, they didn’t mean to ignore him, they loved him and never wanted to lose him.

Jimin, Hoseok and Jin joined the group hug, and Jungkook was happy.

They loved him. 

Or so he thought.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook has to make a difficult decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this took so long! Please don’t be mad at me

Jungkook and Yoongi decided to play together with the sand while their caregivers were arguing from a distance.

”He’s our maknae you know, we have all the right to take him with us home!”, Namjoon said, frustration noticeable in his voice.

”so what?! You ignored him when he needed you the most! Do you have any idea how upset he was when he called me? Huh?!”, Baekhyun screamed back.

Taehyung sighed and pushed the two away. “Stop fighting! How about we let Jungkook choose hm? We will all be nice today and at the end of the day we will let Jungkook choose what he wants. If he wants to stay with EXO that’s okay, if he wants to go home with us that’s also okay.”

Baekhyun wanted to disagree, but as soon as he heard the happy squeals and laughs, he turned around with a sad look. “Fine. But only because I want the best for Jungkook.”

Jungkook hugged Yoongi tight, giggling happily. “Kookie miss YoonYoon vewy much! Does YoonYoon miss Kookie too?”, he asked innocently while he played with the smaller boy.

yoongi nodded. “YoonYoon miss Kookie wots an’ wots... YoonYoon had nightmawes wots, but YoonYoon ish big boy! YoonYoon no scawed when YoonYoon ish wif Kookie!”

Jungkook giggled and kissed Yoongi’s cheek with a loud ‘mwah!’.

———

Yoongi had fun that day. They finally found Jungkook, they played and ate and had fun. They just all enjoyed eachothers company.

But a single and simple question ruined the little’s bliss.

”Jungkook-ah, do you want to go home with us or with EXO?”

Jungkook looked up at Jimin’s question, his gaze shifting between his hyungs and the members of EXO.

Ofcourse, Jungkook wanted to go home with Yoongi and the others, and he wanted to play with them and cuddle with them and be happy.

But even though he was little, he knew they forgot about him last time, and the voice in his head kept telling him that he didn’t matter at all.

Jungkook gulped down some water and looked down, honestly not knowing what to do. 

EXO took care of him when BTS forgot about him. But BTS has been his family for 5 years. 

Jungkook forced himself out of his headspace, his eyes suddenly darker as he was angry.

”Why would I come back to you, when all you did was forgetting about my existence?”

Everyone was surprised by the sudden change of tone.

“Jungkook, wha-..”

”The only thing you ever did was forgetting about me! Forgetting about me, letting me starve in my room, an you expect me to forgive you all so easily?!”

jungkooks face was red from anger as the others stared at him with wide eyes.

’Well...’, Namjoon thought, ‘This might not be as easy as we thought...’

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no inspiration, please leave some requests for the next chapters!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook makes an decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so apparently people don't really get the plot. Let me remind you of the fact that this story has multiple chapters, which means the plot takes longer to develop. just be patient, okay? Please don't comment about this, as this makes me feel like my writing is shitty (which it is, but i don't have to be reminded of that 24/7). Thank you.

Jungkook's face was red from anger as he looked at the other people in the room, their faces a mix of shock and sadness.

Yoongi was clinging onto Jungkooks arm, not understanding what he did wrong. He whined softly, hiding his face as he pouted sadly.

Namjoon was frowning, thinking about what to do next. He couldn't leave Jungkook with EXO right? No, they would take Jungkook with them, no matter what.

Jin patted Hoseok's back, whose face looked like he was trying to hold back tears. The once oh so bright Hoseok had changed into someone who looked unfamiliar, who looked so sad comparing to their sunshine.

Taehyung was staring at a wall. One may say that he was emotionless, that he had a heart made of stone, but Taehyung's hands were trembling with the effort of keeping himself from sobbing, his knuckles white as well as his face.

Jimin was hugging himself, curled up in his seat. He didn't like it when people yelled at him, or anyone actually. Jimin pouted and frowning, his cheeks puffed up.

Bangtan was a mess. A heartbroken mess.

It took all of Baekhyun's strength to not wrap Jungkook in a fluffy blanket right there at the spot. He chuckled softly, looking at the members of Bangtan with a challenging look.

''Guess he doesn't wanna go with you, huh?'', he smirked.

Namjoon glared and turned towards Jungkook again. ''Jungkookie please, we're very sorry. We didn't know that you are a little, we thought that you could take care of yourself, and you never said anything, so we thought you were happy... We were just so busy with upcoming comeback, and the new album and the MV's and Yoongi, we're sorry'', Namjoon said, reaching out to touch Jungkook's arm.

Nobody expected what happened next.

\-----

Taehyung sighed softly, bouncing Jungkook on his knee. The poor boy had burst in tears right after Namjoon had finished talking, small and broken apologies spilling from him as he sobbed into his hands. Everything came crashing down, and his big and little headspace were fighting for control. Little Jungkook wanted nothing more than snuggling up with his hinges, while big Jungkook knew it was too good to be true.

''Shhh, it'll be okay, hyungie is here'', Taehyung softly hummed in an attempt to calm his dongsaeng down.

Jungkook hiccuped, his little space finally winning as he rubbed his eyes. ''K-Kookie wan' go h-home!'', he cried, hiding his face in the crook of Taehyungs neck.

Namjoon smirked slightly and stuck his tongue out to Baekhyun and Suho, lifting Jungkook up. ''Let's go home baby boy, let's go home''

Jungkook nodded, his tears staining Namjoon's shirt. Baekhyun looked at them with a murderous look, and he would've tried to scratch Namjoon if it wasn't for the hand that was gripping his wrist, Xiumin looking at him pleadingly.

Jin got up, holding Yoongi's and Hoseok's hand as he leaded them outside. Taehyung stumbled towards the exit with Jimin clinging onto his back, followed by Namjoon and Jungkook. They were finally going home.

\-----

Jungkook was barely conscious when they reached the dorm, his head resting on Namjoon's shoulder. He yawned softly, his nose scrunching up cutely as he cuddled closer to their leader.

Taehyung followed while holding a sleeping Yoongi, and Jimin smiled softly as he led a sleepy Hoseok inside. Jin brought them all to his room, pushing them down onto his kingsized bed (he needed space for his Mario plushies, and decided to sleep with them) softly, tucking them all in before getting in himself.

They cuddled up, and Jungkook smiled sleepily. ''Kookie wove hyungies...'', he mumbled softly before falling asleep, leaving the others cooing over their maknae's cuteness.

That night Jungkook slept without nightmares for the first time in years, feeling fuzzy and warm when he woke up. He turned around and was met with Hoseoks sleeping face. Jungkook giggled and kissed Hoseoks nose before looking a bit down, seeing Jimin and taehyung hugging his legs, their cheeks squished together. Jungkook laughed softly, watching all his hyungs sleep peacefully, until his stomach grumbled.

Taehyung's eyes fluttered open, as he had been laying with his ear in Jungkook's tummy, and rubbed his eyes, a pout on his face as he felt weird and fuzzy.

Taehyung never felt like this before, he didn't understand what was happening, so he did the one thing he could think of. He started crying.

Everyone shot up, alarmed by the cries that were filling the room. First, everyone looked at Jungkook, which actually made the smaller boy's heart swell with happiness and love, because _they were worried about him_. But it wasn't Jungkook. It wasn't Yoongi either. They didn't expect their Taehyung, their strong boy to cry so loud and heartbrokenly.

Taehyung's face was red, his eyes swollen from crying as he clinged onto Jimin. ''H-Hyu-Hyunnie!!!'', he wailed, sobbing harshly. Jimin frowned and lifted his best friend up, softly bouncing him. It seemed to work, as the cries soon died down to small sniffles and hiccups.

''Wha's wong hyungie?'', Jungkook and Yoongi asked at the same time, their eyes wide, filled with innocence. Everyone cooed while Taehyung sniffled. ''Feew fuzzy, dunno w-what it is...''

''Are you little baby?'', Jin asked, awing when taehyung pouted. ''Don't worry baby, we have space for an other little bay, you cute Taetae'', he said softly.

Jungkook pouted slightly. What about him? They never had time for him i the past, and now suddenly they have time for 3 littles?

Jungkook didn't understand, but he was happy. Happy with his hyungs.

How long would it take for this perfect moment to shatter to pieces?


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything slowly breaks apart again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry.

Taehyung turned out to be an insecure, but happy and very very active little. Which meant they had to supervise him 24/7. Say goodbye to peaceful afternoons, everyone.

Not that anyone disliked Taehyung because of that, no not at all. It just meant getting up earlier and going to bed exhausted.

The first few days were quite nice, Jungkook thought. They played, coloured and watched cartoons together. But he slowly started to notice that Yoongi got less attention than others. 

But Yoongi was the baby of the three, the smallest little, he couldn’t take care of himself. Jungkook pouted.

”Hyung? Yoongi needs a clean diaper”

”Hyung? Yoongi is hungry”

”Hyung? Yoongi feels si-..”

Jungkook decided not to finish that sentence. They weren’t listening at all. This wasn’t fair! Yoongi needed attention too!

Jungkook, being the kind person he is, went to the smaller boy who was feeling miserable and lonely.

”Kookie wiww take cawe of Yoonyoon”

And boy, he kept his promise. But things only got worse.

Taking care of Yoongi while Jungkook himself was still little was so tiring, Jungkook felt like he could just collapse on the floor and sleep for decades.

Yoongi seemed to feel worse every hour, and Jin just wouldn’t fucking notice Jungkook. So he did something stupid to get attention.

Call him pathetic, call him stupid, but he did it for his friend.  

Jungkook walked to the staircase. He hesitated before he let himself fall off it.

He fell down with a serie of loud thuds, and he cried out at the pain it caused. But it was for his friend. He could endure it.

Jin ran towards the stairs and gasped. “Kookie what happened?!”, he asked, lifting the little up and carrying him to the couch. 

Jungkook sniffled and pointed at the stairs. “Yoonyoon is icky, Kookie twy to hewp but feww down...”, he pouted. Hoseok, who had been listening, shot up and ran to Yoongi’s room, awing when he saw the sick baby.

Yoongi’s skin was pale, except for his cheeks which were a bright red.

Jin followed Hoseok while holding Jungkook, who was fine except for the bruise on his cheek. Even Namjoon, Jimin and Taehyung walked in with worry on their faces.

”ish baby icky?”, taehyung asked, a pout on his face. “Taetae ish sowwy”

To everyone’s surprise, Yoongi managed to sit up, weakly hugging Taehyung. “No be...”

Jungkook smiled slightly, as Yoongi finally got nursed back to health. 

_Mission accomplished_

* * *

 

Things were going well, but Jungkook couldn’t help but struggle.

It were always small things. Seeing his Hyungs playing with others, and saying they were busy when he wanted to join, not getting sweets and seeing Taehyung eating a lollipop, not being able to join the movie night.

But what hurted the most were the members talking behind his back.

Jungkook tried to be helpful, but always ended up making a mess. 

“Jin hyung, Kook made a mess again.”

”I swear to god that boy needs to grow u-..”, 

Jungkook didn’t wanted to hear the end of that sentence, old memories climbing up from where he had been trying to forget them.

He ran to his room and slammed the door shut, leaving Jin and apparently Hoseok in the kitchen, a shocked expression on their faces.

”Did... Do you think he heard us?..”

Jungkook angrily threw all his little stuff in a big trash bag, all his stuffies, his pacifiers, his colouring books and even Bunbun.

After some of the anger he felt subsided a bit, he looked at the bag with sad eyes before grabbing the bunny stuffie that stuck out of it. 

“I’m sorry Bunbun...”, he mumbled softly.

 “But hyungies don’t like Kookie no more. So Kookie can only cuddle at night okay? Only cuddle when Kookie is alone.”

”I will be big and follow schedule to please the fans, they are getting wild and worried with the lack of updates”, Jungkook giggled softly.

Jungkook snuck out of the dorm late at night, throwing the trash bag away. He smiled sadly before shaking his head. 

It was time to start all over again.

They would love him now, if he was a perfect Maknae.

Would they?

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook tries, he really does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to finish this story after 10 chapters, because im struggling with a writers block. If i seem to get more inspiration to finish the story further, i might continue it. I am sorry.

Jungkook woke up very very early, his body protesting against any movement as he tried to sit up. His eyes were lidded, clouded with exhaustion as he had cried himself to sleep the night before. His limbs felt like they were made out of stone, heavy and stiff. Jungkook slowly got up and stared at his reflection in the mirror, pouting at himself as he got dressed. He slowly opened the door, biting his lip as it made a low creaking noise. jungkook stood frozen in place for a few moments, hoping his hyungs didn't wake up, before he tiptoed to the kitchen, silently making breakfast and cleaning the whole kitchen after.

After Jungkook put the last things away, he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. Jungkook almost jumped up a few feet into the air, his face pale as he quickly turned around. ''Calm down Gguk, it's me! Jimin!'', the eldest of the maknae line said. Jungkook released a breath he didn't even realise he was holding and bowed slightly. ''good morning Jimin-ssi, I prepared breakfast for you and the other hyungs'', he said softly.

Jimin frowned at the way Jungkook was talking and acting. ''okay..? Well, how about you wake up Taetae and Yoongles, i wake up Hobi, Jinnie and Joon okay?'', he said with a small smile, which Jungkook responded to with a nod and a bow before he left the room. weird.

Jungkook knocked softly on the door before he opened the door that lead him to Yoongi's and Taehyung's room. It might seem a weird combination, the hyperactive baby and the sleepy grandpa, but the two daegu boys really seemed to get along well, especially when one of them would be stressed, both of them easily slipping into satoori. 

Jungkook walked to the bed o the left side of the room, softly tapping his youngest hyung's shoulder. ''Taehyng-ssi? Jimin-ssi told me to wake you up, i prepared breakfast'', he whispered, to which the other responded to with a groan and a whine. Taehyung slowly sat up, his hair a mess and his eyes half closed as he mumbled incoherent things, hugging his pillow to his chest. Jungkook cracked a soft smile and went to the other bed.

''Y-Yoongi-ssi?'', Jungkook asked softly, his voice slightly shaking as it was always scary to wake Yoongi up. Said man turned around, groaning loudly. ''go away'', he mumbled as he covered his face with his pillow. Jungkook softly laughed and tried again. "yoongi-ssi? I prepared breakfast. Jimin-ssi told me to wake you up.''

Young threw his pillow to where he thought was Jungkook as he whined like a child, hiding himself underneath the blanket. Jungkook watched with a sad smile, getting up. ''I will let Jimin-ssi know you'd like to stay in bed'', he said softly before leaving the room. He sat down beside Jimin, bowing slightly towards Seokjin, Hoseok and Namjoon, who were already sitting in the kitchen.

Once everyone was sitting at the table they started eating, the air filled with a happy atmosphere. Jungkook stared at his empty plate, not moving to eat.

''Kookie? Are you okay? Why aren't you eating?'', Hoseok asked, but before Jungkook could respond his attention was drawn to the second-youngest who was sitting on his lap, whining as Hoseok had stopped feeding him. Jungkook pouted slightly but covered it up with a smile, though it never reached his eyes.

 

Once breakfast was done everyone ran around the dorm to grab their stuff for practice. Jungkook waited for them in the living room, his coat and shoes already on and his bag packed and well resting on his lap. As they hurried towards the waiting vehicle, Jungkook noticed the lonely trash bag with his little stuff, tearing up slightly. He felt memories filling his head and tried to force them away, quietly whimpering as he looked down.

If someone noticed, they didn't question it.

Everyone piled up into the van and a comfortable silence fell as it sped off. Jungkook stared out of the window, his arms wrapped around himself as he stared at the big scary world. He just wanted his stuffy and hyungs, but surely they would be disgusted, right?

As soon as Jungkook stepped inside the room, he knew this was going to be a bad day.

''Jungkook, care to explain why you are 5 minutes late?'', their dance instructor stood in front of him, his face twisted into an annoyed expression and his arms crossed over his chest. Jung kook's face paled and he quickly bowed. ''W-We left on time, but T-Taehyung-ssi forgot his pho-...''

''Jeon Jungkook! Don't you dare blaming someone else! If you mess up today, you will have to stay tonight, understand?!''

Jungkook knew better than to say no, so he quickly nodded, lowering his head so no one saw the tears that were threatened to spill. As everyone warmed up and got into position Jungkook tried to ignore the way his throat hurt with the effort of not crying and the way his heart stung knowing the other members didn't help him, even though it wasn't his fault.

When they finished the last routine Jungkook wanted to collapse. His vision was blurry, his limbs heavy and his head felt like there were a thousand needles pressing against his skull. Jungkook barely managed to walk to the side of the room to drink some water, stumbling over his own feet. He heard the other people in the room stiffling giggles and chuckles, and he felt himself blush.

Jungkook grimaced when the dance instructor told him to re-do the choreography on his own while the others took a break, and limped towards the center of the room.

As soon as the music started filling the room Jungkook knew this wouldn't end well. He already felt like he was going to collapse, the room was filled with black dots and all sounds were muffled.

Was it just him or did the temperature rise a few degrees?

He was almost done, he'd almost made it.

His eyes rolled back as he started falling forward, his vision blurry with all the black dots.

He barely registered the screams of surprise and fear.

''Jungkook!''

His body hit the floor with a dull thud, and everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eh there you go


	8. chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook wakes up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have 1090 words of absolute crap. @smollemobean I'm sorry.

Everything was dark and quiet. Not the comfortable kind of quiet, but the kind that would hang heavy in the air and making you feel small and vulnerable. Jungkook looked around and whimpered as he saw nothing but black darkness. He tried to speak, but nothing came out of his mouth, making him scream soundlessly. Jungkook felt like the darkness was suffocating him, the only thing he could hear the absolute silence. His limbs felt heavy, and Jungkook just wanted to get out of there. He screamed and ran and cried for god knows how long, but the silence and darkness stayed. He could've been there for seconds, minutes, hours, years, Jungkook didn't know. But it was hell.

He could faintly hear voices talk, some sounded familiar, some sounded like they belonged to a stranger. Jungkook tried to call out for help, tried to open his eyes, but he couldn't. He tried to move his hand, but he couldn't move an inch. Jungkook continued trying, desperate to reach the small light he saw at the end of the tunnel. But he felt heavy, and his mouth fell open in a silent scream as he got sucked back into the darkness.

After what felt like decades he could hear the voices again, this time louder and clearer. Jungkook tried to open his eyes, trying to swallow past the lump that formed in his already dry throat.

''...-he probably overworked himself, he'll be fine'', he heard someone say, the voice sounding a lot like Namjoon's one.

Jungkook slowly opened his eyes and was met with white walls and an unfamiliar ceiling. he squinted and tried to see who were in the room, standing at the end of the unfamiliar bed. The persons were blurry and weren't looking at him, as they were having an argument about something. The sounds were a bit muffled, but he could hear that their voices were dripping with both annoyance and anger.

''This is all your fault! I knew we shouldn't have let him go home with YOU'', one said, his voice thick with anger and apparently he was barely holding himself together.

''He is OUR maknae, and we couldn't know he pushed himself past his limits. This is his own fault!'', the second one said, and to Jungkook's surprise it was Hoseok who said that. He thought could always rely on the other, but apparently he hated him too, huh.

Nice.

The bickering continued as no one had noticed Jungkook waking up. Jungkook looked around the room without moving his body, staring at Jin who was holding Yoongi close much like a mother would do with her child. When he shifted his gaze to the other side of the room he saw Taehyung staring at his feet while he quietly sang, Jimin's arm wrapped around him protectively. At the end of his bed he could see two blurry persons who looked like Hoseok and Xiumin. Namjoon was standing behind Hoseok and agreed with everything the older said, his arms crossed. The leader's face was twisted in an ugly scowl, which looked kind of scary and intimidating. 

''Kookie's awake.''

Suddenly everything was silent. Everyone stared at Jungkook, and the little felt small and vulnerable as their gazes pieced into him. Jungkook wanted to disappear, whining softly and getting up way too quickly. As the room spun around Jungkook looked around, waiting until the dizzy spell faded so he could talk.

''I-... I'm so sorry to be a burden to all of you, I promise to do better'', He quickly said, stumbling through the sentence and his voice an octave higher, indicating he wasn't big at all. Jungkook felt his face heating up, his cheeks probably red with embarrassment. The absolute silence was making him feel very uncomfortable and nervous, and he started tearing up until he heard Suho, who was standing in the door opening, speak.

''Jungkook-ah, i know that last time we promised you that you could take the decision. But we're taking the other members to court.'', he said with guilt and a hint of sadness audible in his voice. 

Jungkook looked at smaller, yet older boy, his eyes wide with fear. 

''B-But hyungies are nice a-and this was all Kookie's fault!'', he said, his bottom lip trembling as he didn't want to disappoint everyone.

''No kook, this is their fault and you know it'', Suho said softly, unbothered by the fact that Xiumin was holding back a raging Namjoon and Hoseok who were trying to probably kill him.

Jungkook looked down at his hands, and almost jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

''Kook-ah, it's time you tell all of us what's going on exactly.''

* * *

 

After a few nurses ran into the room after hearing all the commotion, everyone had to leave the room so they could examine him, sending him home with a simple 'dehydration and lack of sleep'. Part of Jungkook was happy he got to leave the hospital. He didn't like it there, it always smelt like too many medicine and sickness. The white walls and many corridors made him confused and sad, feeling isolated from the rest of the world. 

On the other hand, he really wasnt happy about going home. After he had stayed with a friend for a few days he got escorted to EXO's dorm. Apparently, the judge had said that all of the members weren't allowed around Jungkook until they heard his side of the story. Jungkook felt uneasy and judged at EXO's dorm. Not that they were mean, no not at all. Jungkook just had the habit of feeling like he was a burden.

Apparently, the members of EXO had scheduled an appointment with a therapist. To clear it up, they told him he'd have to talk. While everyone was in the room.

Jungkook was absolutely terrified.

When the day of the appointment had come, Jungkook felt like everything was a dream. Everything felt unreal, but as soon as he was sitting on the damned plastic chair in front of his hyungs, EXO, their managers and the therapist, Everything came crashing down. He was staring at his hands as the, no, his therapist explained what they would do that day. Jungkook didn't have the courage to look up and see his hyungs' disappointed and sad stares, EXO's encouraging smiles, EXO's manager looking confused and his own manager and CEO looking worried al hell, as the poor man wasn't aware of aware of what was happening to his group's maknae.

''Well Jungkook, let's start.''


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook makes his final decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I apologise. Sorry that it took me so long, I just didn’t have any motivation to do anything at all.

After the therapist asked Jungkook to stand up, the boy did as told and gulped down his fear, though his hands trembled and his eyes were downcast.

“Jungkook. Tell us your story”, the therapist -a nice woman with long black hair and kind brown eyes- said softly, her voice soothing and calm. Jungkook nodded and started.

“E-Ever since I was little I always came in second. My brother was better, he was more handsome, popular, he was very smart and my parents’ favourite. I was mostly forgotten. When I got older l-little space helped me with destressing, but...”, Jungkook pauses and looked at the other members of BTS. 

“Once again I always came in second. Hyung’s d-don’t care about me. Yoongi got all the attention and I was always ignored. I felt lonely and terrible. One day, I was playing with Yoongi, and he asked for his stuffie which sat on top of the closet. I tried to reach it, but fell on top of Yoongi. He of course started crying and I got p-punished and ignored again. After a while I ran away, I couldn’t handle it anymore”, jungkook said softly, totally missing Yoongi’s sniffles and Taehyung’s tears.

“Baekhyun came to get me and I stayed at their house, they treated me nicely and they paid attention to me”, Jungkook said softly, his voice holding a little hope as he looked at Baekhyun and the other EXO members with a small smile. 

“We went to the beach, a-and I saw Yoongi. A-And I missed him, because yoongi never ignored me, and hyungies got m-mad and I go home”, Jungkook started sniffling softly, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

The therapist nodded as she wrote some stuff down. “Okay... But that doesn’t seem to be the ending, does it? Your medical reports say that you were brought to the hospital with a severe dehydration and exhaustion, probably due to overworking. Can you tell me what exactly happened?”

Jungkook whined quietly but nodded, looking down at his feet as he tried to ignore everyone’s faces and the thick tension that hang in the air.

“J-Jin and Hoseok were talking about me an’ saying I’m annoying so I thought they would throw me out or ignore me again. So I threw away all my stuffies an’ toys and tried to be a good boy. A-An meanie yell at Kookie during p-pwactice an evewything huwt an then Kookie faint!”, Jungkook managed to say, his voice getting higher and more childish every second as he slowly started losing the battle between little space and being an adult.

Taehyung suddenly got up and hurriedly left the room, though everyone could hear the soft sniffles and sobs from the boy. Namjoon wanted to go after him, but was held back by Hoseok.

“I... Uhm, Jungkook-ah... We owe you an apology. We never meant to ignore you and make you feel terrible, the comeback stressed us out.”, Jimin said softly, a frown on his face. 

“We know that’s not a proper reason, there is no way to make up for what we have done. But we hope you can forgive us, Jungkook”, Jin added, rubbing Yoongi’s back. The second eldest looked up at Jungkook, big crocodile tears streaming down his puffy, red cheeks as he made grabby hands at Jungkook. “P-pwease no weave, Y-Yoonie wove K-Kookie!”, he cried out, and all everyone did was watch in silence. Sejin and Bang PD looked furious, their fists trembling with the effort of holding back their anger towards BTS. Baekhyun was smiling softly and silently supporting Jungkook, as well as the other members of EXO.

Jungkook took a moment to calm down. “I don’t care what you say, you hurt me. All of you. More than once. And I will not let that happen again.”

The room was silent, aside from the sound of 4 hearts breaking, one that didn’t understand and one that has yet to hear it. 


End file.
